New Year’s Resolutions, We Have to Love Ourselves ‘Enough’ to Stick With ‘Em

*No preaching. Just real talk with solutions that I hope will help us all win. If you’re anything like me, your New Year vision starts off with a lot of determination. I’m going to take charge! Become healthier! Work smarter! Give more! Be better! Blah. Blah. Blah.

Thing is, after the first three months of the new year, here I go, backslidin’….AGAIN! Losing steam. Asking myself, ‘what did I say I was gonna do?’

I don’t know about you, but this is a look I’m sick of. There’s got to be a better way. I don’t want something bad to happen that will force me to do better. Why can’t I do better before something happens? Don’t I love myself? Don’t I love my family? Don’t I love life?

YES I DO!!!!

But apparently, not ENOUGH. I’ve obviously got to love these things MORE.

I decided to explore some of the reasons we lose steam so quickly. As someone who started out as a psychology major, and went on to teach communications based on behaviors; someone who comes in contact with a lot of personalities and behaviors every single day! I’d better get back to basics to better understand my own self.

Hopefully, with this understanding, and the knowledge that I’m not alone, THIS year, making those resolutions and fulfilling them, will be a game changer!

After all, when we know better we do better right?

Why we lose steam so quickly with our New Year’s Resolutions

It has been reported that nearly half of us make New Years resolutions, but on 8 percent of us actually stick with them. Here’s a few reason why.

 

  • It’s no fun going it alone. We need a buddy who is like-minded and dealing with the same stuff that we are. If its weight, get together with that buddy and set a goal that you KNOW is attainable for you both. While you do what to challenge yourself, setting too lofty a goal will only cause you to feel defeated. You can always alter and revise the original goal once you reach it. When we were speaking of exercise my doctor once told me, “hopefully, it will become addictive.” I’ve seen it happen (just not with me yet!)
  • We get distracted (and stay distracted) by little things. Oh god. This is SO me. I swear, you know when you are in that twilight sleep? Just before its time to open your eyes and get up? You’re kind of planning your day and, with me, my intentions are to pray first, then get on the elliptical before the work day starts.

Then I wake up. With this “awakening” comes checking emails & texts; going on social media, and anything else I convince myself will “only take a minute.”

Hours later, I’m like, “OMG! I’m late for work!” Where did the time go? Better yet, what happened to getting on that elliptical?

I’d better realize that the emails, texts and social media posts are going nowhere fast. I’ve got to stop being distracted by them! It’s that simple.

Time Management

This is a big one! No, we’re not lazy, darn it! Sometimes we just take on too much and don’t consider the time restraints. There are only 24 hours to a day and we’re at work for at least 10 of them — including travel to and from if you don’t work from home.

  • “I resolve to devote five minutes a day to being clutter-free and organized,” says professional organizer Melinda Massie. “The easiest way to get and stay organized and clutter-free is to make it a daily habit, and everyone can spare five minutes a day,” says Andrew Schrage, founder of MoneyCrashers.
  • He also suggests that we don’t give up so easily.  “To cure this issue, try to set benchmarks throughout the year. By doing so, you can keep yourself on track throughout the year and use the power of positive reinforcement to keep your momentum going.”

So let’s start (and stop) with these simple steps. Not a whole lot of reading. Let’s set a few goals — maybe two or three — something both challenging AND attainable. Let’s make a promise to ourselves that this year, since we recognize our behavior pattern, we’re going to go about it differently. After all, when we think of showing gratitude — what better way than taking action…on ourselves?

My hope for you, dear readers, is that you become all you want to be, in the most perfect way for you, in 2018.

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