*Imagine you’re dead. OK wait, I started that wrong, imagine you’re driving along, and you’ve swerved the hell out of the van in front of you, trying to get by. The guy driving obviously has some kind of attitude because how could he NOT see you trying to get by? Meanwhile, both lanes to your right and left are bumper to bumper traffic.
What to do? What to do? Now you’re in hater-mode!
But wait! Instant karma has struck that dumb piece of sh*t in front of you because his back door has flung open. Hahahaha!
Uh oh… What’s that?
Is that a dead BODY!???
You’re darn skippy it is. And that big white van belongs to the coroner’s office.
*Not to judge, but I guess you can justify just about anything. Who knew one day there would be computers? Cellphones? Drive-thru funeral services?
***Insert sound of screeching car brakes here***
Yes. You read that correctly. Please know that I am attempting to present this to you using my game face (though something inside of me wants to bust out laughing). My apologies in advance for any offense that may cause somebody. But a funeral home in Memphis is giving this new concept a go.
And who am I to think that’s funny?
The R. Bernard Funeral Home is housed in a building that was formerly a bank, and for some ungodly reason, they feel they absolutely must use the drive-thru window. For what for, you ask?
Ah! Here’s something: As a way for people to view their recently departed…without getting out of the car.
*People, authorities included, are still shaking their heads as to why a woman allegedly reached into a coffin and slashed the face of the deceased woman inside.
But this is what 26-year-old Shaynna Sims of Tulsa, Oklahoma has been accused of doing, and she was arrested at the funeral home after people saw her with her hands in the coffin, and the authorities found a knife in her possession.
Since her arrest, Sims has been booked on charges of vandalizing a corpse.Continue reading →