Category Archives: Are You Serious?

Has Pro-Colorism Dating Site, Smoochr, Pissed ‘You’ Off…Yet?

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*Imma be upfront witchu’ right now. I marvel at some of the sh*t my publisher throws my way and expects me to write about. Like this article on a dating site that has Black folk choosing who they’d like to share their journey with based solely on colorism. I’d of NEVER even looked at this twice because of my own disdain for the whole “light skin, dark skin” bull. What can I say? I just don’t come from that place. But then again, I have always had this way about me that looks at the positive side of everything. And though I will be the first to say not EVERYTHING has a positive side (afterall, I’m still trying to find Donald Trump’s…and yes, I am aware I have identified him as a “thing”) I can lift a positive from why my publisher thought I should write on this colorism site thing: Because, after working with me for close to 15 years, he thinks I can write thoughtful commentary on everything. Anything. As in bar-none. That is the only thing I can think of at this point.

So let’s get started, shall we?

In my opinion, Smoochr was designed for people shallow enough to think that a potential partner can be found (and kept) based on their complexion, grade of hair, and hell, I don’t know, the size of their lips?

Wait! I was just kidding, but even since writing that line I’ve discovered, yes, that is one of the profile questions.

In all honesty, many black folk are mad as hell that such a site exists. And what can you say about a site whose OWNER or FOUNDER won’t even come forth? Hell, we wouldn’t even know about Smoochr if it were not for tech developer Elen Awalom, whose own disdain for the site motivated her to create the hastag  #ShutDownSmoochr recently.

So now, here we are. And thanks to an article in The Root, we get to see the profile questions without even having to sign up. We also get to see how others’ feel about the site. Continue reading

Fired Disney Employee Says ‘Everybody’s Having Sex’ Backstage

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*Uh oh. Nothing hurts worse than being fired. And all bets are off when folks feel they have been let go unjustly. Oftentimes they want revenge and will get what we call …wait for it…diarrhea of the mouth. This may be what happened to a former Disney World employee. We don’t know why it was that Disney decided to let her go, and quite frankly, we don’t really care. But we like the fact that she is willing to talk about what its like to work there…for real. Now look, its no secret that Walt Disney didn’t give one damn about Black folk, that’s why any characters he created depicting us was straight up stereotype and racist.

But we’re not here to talk about that. Really. What we can at least get a kick out of right here, right now, is a former employee who happens to be white, telling us what its REALLY like to work at what he described as the “Happiest Place on Earth.”

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She starts out saying: “Working at Disney World may seen like a dream job to visitors, but behind the scenes, we are placed in shackles and forced to follow a very large and very strict rule book. Don’t get me wrong, there were a lot of great times, but here are 20 SECRETS everybody needs to know about working at Disney World…”

Woo….

I think it was number 16 where she shared how EVERYBODY’S HAVING SEX.

She says,

“When you have women beautiful enough to be princesses and men attractive enough to be heros, it’s no surprise that all the Cast Members backstage are DOING IT. I literally walked in on Ariel doing it with Aladdin. (Thankfully, not in costume, as that would have ruined my childhood.)” Continue reading

Watch: Viral Video Shows Little White Girl Cussin’ Up a Storm

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*“Let me kill this baby … You are a bad motherf*cker. That’s why you always have to get in jail,” can you believe that these are the words coming from the mouth of a six-year-old who’s elder is videotaping her? It all began when the woman behind the camera asked the little girl to “show us how you play with your doll.”

That’s when the tirade began.

I’m sure Black folk all over the world are jumping for joy that its not one of ours. Continue reading

Where Are All of the Pokemon Negroes?

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*At one point, I really thought I was the last person on earth who hadn’t heard of Pokemon Go, the allegedly interactive mobile game that’s being played on literally millions of mobile devices as I type. Even with reports of players falling off of cliffs, being robbed, and even killed, it’s caught on like wildfire — kinda this summer’s Candy Crush (a fad I also missed).

About a week after Pokemon Go’s launch, I counted over two dozen people staggering along the river adjacent to my neighborhood, staring at the small screens in each of their hands.

During the same walk, I saw a guy on his hands and knees reaching desperately into a curbside sewer grate. He’d accidentally dropped his iPhone into it while playing Pokemon Go.

At another point during that evening’s junket, another dog walker warned me to be careful, as a group just down the path had spotted a rattlesnake in the adjacent brush. As I cautiously approached the gathering crowd, I wondered why they were all staring at their phones in the midst of a poisonous serpent. Were they trying to get a good picture of the snake?

No. It turned out they had spotted a rattata, one of the much-sought-after characters in Pokemon Go.  The guy who’d warned me had thought they said “rattler.” Continue reading

WTF…13-Year-Old Shoots Elderly Couple in Beauty Supply Store? (Video)

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*Now this should just piss you off.

According to a report by the St. Louis Dispatch, two teen girls were suspected of shoplifting at a beauty supply store in Missouri. The business is owned by a Korean family, and when the girls were confronted, one was taken in after a previous juvenile warrant was discovered, but the other — a 13-year-old — was let go with a formal warning and the approval of the store owners.

But “Miss Thang” apparently didn’t appreciate this, and decided to return to the store hours later, WITH A GUN, and proceeded to SHOOT the couple.

You know how we do: Right is right and wrong is wrong! Family members marched her a** right up to the police station and had her turn herself in! Continue reading

Police Chief Reaches Out to Author of Viral Post on Racism

Police Chief Robert Marshall
Police Chief Robert Marshall

*It may be difficult to hear because of the rage many of us are experiencing as we find ourselves living in the most racially-charged, divisive era since legalized slavery; but there may actually be police officers of Caucasian descent out there who want to change things, just don’t know how.

Hear me out. 

You may have heard about the essay a brother named Brian Crooks wrote and posted on Facebook. Crooks says he’s been using his Facebook page to write about incidents of injustice on Black people by police since 2006. His posts were inspired by a man named Sean Bell. You may recall Bell, a Black man, was killed in Queens, New York in 2006, after police fired 50 rounds at a car near a strip club. His friends, who had taken him out on the night before his wedding, were luckier. They were only wounded.

I remember Mr. Bell’s story well. How I reeled in horror wondering why these muh-fuh’s thought it necessary to FIRE 50 SHOTS into a car at all. It sounded like a scene from Bonnie & Clyde!

Crooks’ Facebook post talks about his growing up in Naperville, a town with very few Blacks and attending Neuqua High. He claims he didn’t necessarily set out to write such a long soliloquy (my word) on race though and seems more surprised than anyone that it has hit such a nerve and attracted so much attention.

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“I really thought only 10 to 15 people at most would read it,” Crouch said, after learning his post had gone viral. He apparently knows how short peoples’ attention span on the Internet is, and admits that this short attention span mirrors his own reality.

But after uploading his 4,747-word post on July 9, it was shared 300 times the first day and the numbers only grew throughout the week, by Thursday, more than 10,000 shares had taken place. The media went wild; sharing excerpts and stories in publications such as USA Today, the Des Moines Register, the Iowa City Press Citizen, the Naperville Sun.

Apparently, Chief Robert Marshall caught wind of it and found it hard to just go to another page. He wanted to talk to the author. So he placed the call.

You still with me? Continue reading

Wow! That’s a Lot of Babies: Twins Times Three! (Watch)

Danesha Couch smiles during interview
Danesha Couch smiles during interview

*I suppose one way to wrap your brain around the realization that you have produced three sets of twins in a little over two years and your future for the next 18 will be centered around taking care of ‘dem babies is being grateful that you can produce children at all.

After all, as Danesha Couch, a 20-year-old mother of five, knows so well, there are many women who cannot. She smiles as she talks to the media, and shares how people respond when she tells them about her large family.

“People just consider me a freak of nature when I tell them,” Couch said.

Unless you actually come from a family with a history of multiple births, its safe to assume that most women who plan for children never think of having more than one baby at a time. But when Couch had her first set of twins, and then had a repeat with the second, the question that probably comes to the mind of many is, why even take the risk a third time?

According to one report, the chances of having THREE sets of twins is something like 1 in 88,000.

But…I don’t think Danesha ever got this memo. Continue reading

Professor States a ‘Blacks Only’ Nation is ‘Fairly Easy’ (to Accomplish)

Christian Davenport
Christian Davenport

*Desperate times call for desperate measures, right? The racial divide is wider than ever now, what with the heightened tensions between the men in blue and Black folk. As if African Americans and other Black folk being killed in cold blood by police — seemingly with little to no provocation — wasn’t enough, now it is the police who have begun to find themselves facing the barrel of a bullets escape.

Good lord! How on earth did we get here? 

Now the idea has been introduced to consider the thought of a “Blacks Only” nation. Or it might be more accurate to say, REconsider; seeing as “there are large sections of the United States that have nothing but black people in them already,” according to what Christian Davenport, a University of Michigan political science professor told the Atlanta Black Star during an interview. “There are cults and militias as well as private corporations that do whatever they want behind their closed doors” Davenport added, saying, “The idea of Black folk coming together thus does not seem that difficult to me.” Continue reading