Category Archives: Jokey Jokes

ThisNthat Quickbits: Are We Bananas or Is This One Handsome Gorilla? (Photos & Video)

They call me "Shabani." What's your name sugar?
They call me “Shabani.” What’s your name sugar?

*Hey, we gotta give credit where its due. And who says human males are the only species and sex that can be called fine.

Well they lied.

Take Shabani the gorilla. Japanese women are said to be getting to the zoo to see him by any means necessary.

And its not like he doesn’t realize he’s got their attention. Just look at the photos. After a while he just starts posing for them.

Talk about being ready for your close-up.

The recently discovered “sex symbol?” (their words, not mine) has actually been living at the Higashiyama Zoo and Botanical Gardens in Japan since 2007. But I guess it was only recently that he began to grow into his looks.

Apparently, he’s feelin’ himself too, at least from the looks of the photos and video below. Continue reading

Heinz Ketchup Major ‘Oops’ — Bottle’s QR Code Links to Porn Site

Heinz2

*If you weren’t careful enough to investigate, you may have thought the iconic brand of ketchup many of us grew up with had changed direction. But that’s not the case, the brand is still on track as regular old ketchup. And Heinz is offering an apology for a snafu with some of their ketchup bottles that still carries an old QR code that now links to an X-rated site, according to CNN Money.

After receiving a complaint from Daniel Korell on Thursday, Heinz couldn’t respond fast enough. Korell alerted the company that when he scanned the code on the ketchup bottle it actually uploaded to a porn site. In his post on the company’s Facebook page, Korell said that the ketchup “is probably not for minors” and added a photo of the spicy hot site. Continue reading

Oops! Did I Say That? … 10 Things that ‘Force You’ to Cuss (If You’re Not Careful!)

Shiznit-Fudgenuts-Moms-Guide-Cursing

*Warning: Not for the faint-hearted: This article was inspired by all the reasons people are forced, yes forced,  to cuss.

No really, if you think about it, you will realize you didn’t intend to use that derogatory word, but certain “things” got in the way of your good intentions and before you could even edit yourself, out of your mouth came words that would make even your mama blush.

It’s OK, I doubt you’ll be struck down by lightning or sent straight to hell for the mess up. But damn, whether you’re honest enough to admit it or not, I’ll bet you feel a lot better afterwards.

Hee. Hee. Hee. Here’s to the “little devil” in us all!

A humorous look at using bad words. After all, it’s what makes us imperfectly human. 

come-my-friend-let-us-cuss-things-in-general-quote-1

ThisNthat Quickbits: 911 Caller Reports Bengal Tiger ‘Just Laying on Truck’

KATU_stuffed_tiger_jef_150610_16x9_992

*The caller seemed relatively calm, considering what he was describing to the 911 operator: “I just came from Lacamas Lake and there’s a couple of guys in a dark truck. It has a Bengal tiger laying beside it…It may be their pet. I don’t know.”

He continued,

“It was wagging its tail and they were rubbing its side,” he said later in the call.

“The more I think about it, it seems pretty dangerous,” the caller added. “At first I thought, well it must be a big stuffed animal and then it started moving and it wasn’t stuffed.” Continue reading

New Punishment for Teens & Tweens Going Viral: Beware the ‘Ugly Haircut’

ugly haircut1

*Uh-oh. I hate to say it, but this might be seen as the perfect punishment for your teen or tween.

A ugly hair cut.

And the photos parents are putting online after making their kid get one is going viral.

Please don’t report me to the authorities, but this is funny as hell.

I know if my parents would’ve threatened me with some crap like this when I was younger, I would’ve straightened up with a quickness!

It all started with a barber named Russell Fredrick, whose 12-year-old son kept messin’ around in school and ignoring homework assignments.

Apparently nothing worked in trying to get the kid on the straight and narrow, so Mr. Fredrick used his greatest weapon: his clippers. Continue reading

Here’s 4 Things You Can Do to Shake a Funky Attitude

Bad Attitude

*Dayum. Seriously? Do you want to walk around looking (and feeling) like that all day long? 

Of course not!

Hey, life is tough. Sometimes it even sucks. And not everyone has learned how to roll with the punches. You’ve heard the saying, “misery loves company,” well by now we’ve tested that baby and know it to be true! And even when we try our best to rise above our funky demeanor, we don’t always hit our mark so, here’s 4 Things You Can Do to Shake A Funky Attitude.

Sonic Drive-In Throws Employee Under the Bus When Photo of Food in Restroom Surfaces

Sonic+Facebook

*Nothing but nasty in every possible language.

When a dad was faced with the chore of leaving the movie at Sonic Drive-in (Yes, they apparently still have those) to take his kids to the restroom, we’re sure he didn’t expect to see food stored in there.

But lo and behold, he did.

So what else was a mortified dad to do but take a picture and put it on Facebook.

Josh Benteman took the original photo of loaves of hamburger and hotdog buns right next to the toilet at the Sonic Drive-In in Topeka, Kansas. Continue reading

Are You Nuts? Inventor Tests Product With Gun Shot to the Groin! (Watch)

 

o-BULLETPROOF-JOCKSTRAP-570

*Now, we know your first thought might be: you know that you’ve really messed up anytime you feel you’ve got to wear a bulletproof jockstrap.

But this product was “inspired” by something a little less, how shall we put this…evil.

So, in an attempt to prove that his invention actually works, one man went so far as to test it — with a gunshot to the testicles.

Ouch!

But Jeremiah Raber obviously felt he couldn’t convince anyone that his product is worth investing in, in any other way.

And hello…lest we forget the groin is the first place you go when it comes to disabling a man.

Duh. Continue reading