Category Archives: Jokey Jokes

‘Aww, He Didn’t Know’ – Drug Suspect’s Dog Leads Police Right To Him (As He Crouches in Back Yard Bushes)

dog who led cops to drug dealer

*No Spot, bad doggie! This is most likely what was coming out of the mouth of one man who is now behind bars. According to Reuters, Alabama police located a suspected drug dealer, but not by their own efforts, with the help of the suspects dog. The suspect was apparently hiding in tall grass near his home and his ever-loyal companion – “Bo” – probably thought it was a game as he wagged his tail enthusiastically and led the officers right to him, police said on Thursday, according to Reuters.

Awe…he didn’t know… Continue reading

Man Arrested for Illegal Pot Possession Tells Cops ‘I’m Denzel Washington’

Justin Lee Seay (L) Denzel Washington (R) Comparison? Naw...
Justin Lee Seay (L) Denzel Washington (R) Comparison? Naw…

 

*Mr. Washington, if you’re reading this, a 21-year-old Tennessee man has obviously got hold of some bad stuff. He wanted officers who arrested him for possessing weed illegally to believe that he was you.

As far as I know, he told them this with a straight face.

But the officers were apparently no dummies. They told Justin Lee Seay of Memphis – and I quote – “You’re not fooling anyone” right before they realized he had also violated his probation on a separate case. Continue reading

Mistaken Welsh Translation Has Cash Machine Offering ‘Free Erections’

Tesco-free-erections-528698

*Hear ye, hear ye! This cash machine has a message for you; but its not the one its makers intended so, never mind. Tesco’s translation blooper offered ‘free erections’ instead of ‘free cash’ at a hole-in-the wall in Wales.

People in the Welsh town of Aberystwyth, where the faulty feature took place, had plenty to laugh about upon seeing it.

The sign should have read ‘arian am ddim’ which means ‘free money’ but instead it read ‘codiad am ddim’ which means free erections. Continue reading

Attention Rite-Aide Shoppers! Don’t Be Alarmed By The Bear Cub in Aisle Three (Video)

Bear in Rite Aid

*Let’s see. Did she say milk or cheese? Maybe it was sausages? Oh what cute stationary. Oh crap, here comes the humans!

Recently, shoppers in an Oregon Rite-Aide found something they didn’t quite expect in aisle 3 of the store. A bear cub – just walking around as calm as you please.

You could hear comments by store staff and shoppers saying things like, “I’ll back up if he gets to close,” and “How cute.” Continue reading

Detroit Man Will Swap His Decrepit House for Your iPhone 6

Detroit man swap home for iphone 6

*Don’t look too bad on the outside, huh? With the price of real estate sky-rocketing all over the place, you may want to seriously consider taking this man up on his offer to swap his decrepit house in Detroit for an iPhone 6.

The house has three bedrooms, a basement and garden. But as you can imagine, its in pretty bad shape. For starters, it has no front door and broken windows.

The house has been on the market in the bankrupt city, but so far nobody has come forward to buy.

Continue reading

Are You Nuts!? Not Anymore. Man Says Here’s Why I Cut My Penis Off (NSFW Photo!)

Man-Removes-Penis

WARNING: You may be offended by the content and images in this story.

*The answer to that headline question is probably “absolutely not!” Seeing as nuts is no longer a part of the subject’s anatomy. Have you ever heard the term “nullo?” Well, since we know that we can learn something new every day. This is today’s “new thing.” A “nullo” is a man who has removed his sex organ. And the man in this story that decided to become one recently opened up about why he decided to cut his penis and testicles off and become a “nullo.”

Of course there’s the option to take a look at the bottom of this story.

He goes by the name “Gelding,” and he’s not surprised that people think he’s a bit strange once they learn what he’s done. Continue reading

Oh Snap! Did This Crow Say ‘F-U’ to A Man Who Insulted His Beak?

Angry-and-sweary-birds-Crow-says-fk-you-to-man-after-being-insulted

*Dang. Life is a blip! Even the birds are cussin’!

In a video quickly headed to viral madness, a man and woman appear to be observing a crow, who has flown over in a particularly over-friendly way to possibly be petted.

The woman is laughing as she asks the man if he is going to pet the bird. And the bird looks like he is stepping up to the occasion.

But when the woman asks the question, the man shys away and says the bird “has a big-ass beak.”

Apparently, this bird knows an insult when he hears one and casually says, what sounds like, F-you!

Watch the video and listen for yourself.

Continue reading

In Disasterous Makeover! Top Model Gives Guy ‘Lace Front Beard’ (Video)

Fake beard

*Just breathe through it and you’ll be done was the advice one “America’s Next Top Model” staffer gave an anxiety-ridden “Phil” in the first episode of ANTM that started having men on the show (scroll down to see the Jesus look video). Phil was getting a weave, still seen as something rare for a man (but probably not as rare as they would like us to believe!) Now Tyra and her comrades – who obviously thought that show was the bomb – went in for a repeat performance last night when they blessed another man with a gift of fake-hair. Only this time, the weave wasn’t on his head.

All I can say is, I hope that he, too, was given the aforementioned advice.

The TV viewing audience most likely gasped when they got a look at this latest look on the makeover show.

A man wearing a lace-front…wait for it…BEARD.

Continue reading