Category Archives: Jokey Jokes

Holy Crap! Massive Alligator Just Walks on By as Woman Videotapes (Look!)

alligator, huge

*La dee dah. Imagine you’re just walking along, looking up and all around you, being thankful. And then you stop in your tracks just as a massive-sized alligator crosses your path, “Oh excuse me, I’m just going over here” he seems to say as he strolls on by. This was a moment in the life of a woman visiting Circle B Bar Reserve near Lakeland, Florida. She described the video she took of a 12-foot, possibly 800 pound alligator who strolled across the path she was walking on “very exciting.”

Yes she was is the answer to the question I know crossed your mind just now.

The woman, who took the video over the weekend appears to be standing too close for comfort, but she said she was “close enough” but at a safe distance. Continue reading

People Have Done Some CRAZY SH*T in Job Interviews, Check Out these Insane Actions!

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*Ah, the dreaded job interview. Nail biting time for some folks, while others, like me (blame it on a background in theatre) see it as just another audition and welcome the challenge.

Nerves can play you like a fiddle. They can make you do the damndest things. I’ve seen people laugh uncontrollably when they’re nervous, shut down completely, and have anxiety attacks so severe that sound reasoning becomes impossible.

But what you will see coming up takes the entire cake. They are some of the STRANGEST things that people have done in job interviews. Recognize any of ’em? I don’t know you personally so if you see yourself it was quite by accident. No offense. The interviewer didn’t contact me about you. Continue reading

Illusionist David Blaine Crosses His OWN Line, Shoots Himself in Mouth When Stunt Goes Wrong!

David Blaine
David Blaine

*Damn David, you’re my favorites, but WTF?  If you’re a magic buff like I am, you no doubt know who David Blaine is. Blaine is the amazing illusionist and endurance artist who never wasted time on stupid card tricks. No, he started off blowing folks’ minds levitating; doing crazy things like walking on water (no offense, Jesus), being buried alive and even hanging upside down for 40 hours. He definitely thinks out of the box, But this time he went too far and almost killed himself. He shot himself in the mouth.

I’ll give you a minute to absorb that.

You a’iight? Due to extreme luck, or whatever you may choose to call it…so is he.

Blaine’s stunt actually went wrong during his Beyond Magic show last November. But it was only broadcast on E4 on Saturday night during a clip showing him spitting frogs out of his mouth into the audience.

Yeah, he can be pretty gross too. Continue reading

Friday Funnies: Dog Gets Put on Blast for Snoring, One Cluckin’ Awesome Chicken Band (Watch)

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*Yes you were. No I wasn’t. I’ve got the video! This is what one adorable pooch had to endure when his owner pulled a dirty trick on him as he was sleeping. Poor doggie was getting a deep sleep in when his tricky human decides to tape his snoring. Funny stuff. See video below.

Kinda makes me want to playback that recording I have of a certain friend who swears by god he doesn’t snore.

Continue reading

Pranksters Decide to Change ‘Hollywood’ Sign to ‘Hollyweed’ for a Day!

 

 

hollyweed

*Oh boy.  And to think I was just apologizing to a visitor: “Too bad we can’t take you up to see the Hollywood sign,” as we traveled down the famed street in Los Angeles — with them looking at the handprints in cement in from of the old Mann’s Chinese Theater (now ‘TCL’ sumpthin’); as the children took pictures with the likes of Batman, Mickey & Minnie, Edward Scissorhands, The Joker and the man with the huge yellow snake.

I am so glad I didn’t point for them to actually look up. 

I can just hear the children now. “Mommy, THAT doesn’t spell Hollywood.” Continue reading

‘Crafty 6-Year-Old’ Uses Sleeping Mom’s ‘Fingerprint’ to Purchase $250 Pokemon Merchandise

pokeman

*Oh god. You know how we love to get pats on the back from our friends and family who acknowledge we are raising brilliant children. Those who bring A’s home from school; have performed in talent shows; and continue to do their best in their endeavors. But what on earth do you do or say about a child who proved how “smart” she is by taking the hand of her napping mother, and using her mom’s finger to unlock the cellphone. I’m not done. She then goes online and winds up purchasing $250 worth of toys? Pokemon Toys!

Say what?

Damn you modern technology!!!!!

Ashlynd Howell is the crafty little girl who was able to unlock the code and purchase the merchandise without her mom’s knowledge.

The first thing the little girl’s mother, Bethany Howell, thought was that she had been the victim of some kind of identity theft. But then, according to the Wall Street Journal, the parents began to think Ashlynd had a hand in it — but that the little girl had purchased the items by mistake.

Until baby-girl came clean. Continue reading

Christmas Might Be Over, But the Returns are Just Starting!

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*Not that you’re ungrateful but…Well, you kind of are. Somebody probably spent money they really didn’t have on something for you and you gave a weak ass smile knowing you were going to take it back first thing in the morning.

I know this from experience. I remember spending my last $40 on a sweater for my daughter a few years back. And no, it wan’t an “ugly sweater” — at least I didn’t think so. She may not have returned it, but she certainly has not worn it.

Another time, I spent $99 on one of those leather organizers for her. Only to learn that the whole digital revolution was just around the corner.

She never used that either.

I can’t wait to see what she does with the sterling silver necklace! Continue reading

Uh-oh! Whipped Cream Shortage This Christmas

A slice of pumpkin pie topped with a dapple of whipped cream. This image can easily be isolated for insertion anywhere in your design.

*Consider it a Christmas catastrophe!

Due to a fatal explosion of a Florida nitrous oxide plant in August, there is a shortage of whipped cream cans used by brands like Reddi-wip.  

Nitrous oxide is the force behind the power of those glorious cans that annual help top off my sweet potato pie.  Also known as “laughing gas,” nitrous oxide also is used by hospitals and dentists.  After the explosion, Airgas (the gas’ biggest supplier) had to shut down production “indefinitely.” Continue reading