*Call the paramedics!
An attorney from Kenya plans to make the President and First lady an offer in exchange for the hand of their eldest daughter in marriage.
I wouldn’t be surprised if just the mention of the word “marriage” in connection with their 16 year old daughter, Malia, sent President Barack Obama and First Lady, Michelle, into a series of convulsions.
While I am sure the First Family is more than aware that age is just a number in the African culture, let’s face it: We are not in Africa. And age to Americans, when talking marriage, is the only number we see if its 16.
But Kenyan attorney Felix Kiprono from Nairobi, is very serious about his offer. And is drafting a letter on it “as we speak.”
“People might say I am after the family’s money, which is not the case. My love is real,” he told the Nairobian newspaper.
He even added that he’s been faithful to ‘his beloved’ since he first became aware of her.
And that’s more than a little creepy, if you ask me.
“I got interested in her in 2008,” Kiprono elaborates. “As a matter of fact, I haven’t dated anyone since and promise to be faithful to her. I have shared this with my family and they are willing to help me raise the bride price.”
Kiprono is currently working on a letter to announce his intentions and plans to give it to the local U.S. Embassy.
But be warned, dear sir, before it reaches the hands of the president it will have been soaked, beat, and dried out on a grill to ensure it is safe.
And this offer of cows, goats and sheep is not a paltry one. Based on Farming prices in Africa, Kiprono’s offer could be worth in excess of $90,000.
Aside from the obvious issue (age), if the offer were even to be considered, Malia, an American in every sense of the word, would need to adapt to a very different lifestyle.
“Ours will be a simple life. I will teach Malia how to milk a cow, cook ugali (a porridge) and prepare mursik (a sour milk) like any other Kalenjin woman,” he said.
Boy, wouldn’t you love to be a fly on the wall of the White House when this is being discussed?