*Parenting is hard as hell. Especially when it has to occur in spite of a relationship gone sour. Adults have a hard time being grown up. We sometimes have a hard time with the “at the end of the day” stuff. The stuff that actions are made of. And though I’m no psychologist, I do know that actions follow thoughts. And at the end of the day, where children are concerned, they respond better to life when they see their parents working together.
Often we hear stories of Black men who have brought children into the world and left. This absence can be for a variety of reasons and challenges that can quickly lend itself to judgment…so I’m not going to address them here.
The open letter, ‘Please Let Me Be A Daddy to My Son,’ is written for the public to see; but I hope this father realizes that he has actually written the letter to the mother of his child. That is why I titled it the way I did. The letter introduces us to a man who does have a great job. A man who says he does want a relationship with his young son. A man who claims he has kept up with child support payments (faithfully) and simply wants to be a dad to his son.
The problem, according to the author: The child’s mother, who Marcus Beal says has insisted that this will not happen. And left to her own devices, he will never have access to “her son.”
I realize this is only one side of a two-sided story.
So here is his.
Marcus Beal is a firefighter. From the way he presents the letter, he appears to be a good father to his young son. But he is also going broke in the process. He has raised some of the money he needs (I believe to pay legal costs), but every little bit helps. By donating to this father’s cause, you are truly changing the life of his son.
My name is Marcus Beal, a devoted, loving father and Boston firefighter. In the photo with me is my 18 month old son, Marcus-Aurelius Garvey Beal. I come to you hat in hand and humbled beyond measure. I am embroiled in what has turned out to be a bitter and unnecessary custody battle. The mother of my son has vowed to keep me out of his life.
Due to our failed relationship, my son’s mother has taken our child out of Massachusetts, his birthplace, and back to her home state of Michigan. When she informed me that she will not be returning to Massachusetts, and stated “you will not be a father to my child”, I took legal action. During the court proceedings, I proposed a co-parenting schedule and sought joint legal custody. She unilaterally shot them down. My son’s mother let it be known that she will not grant me any form of access to my son unless it was ordered by a judge.
I was awarded parenting time/visitation, a 20 minute weekly Skype session and ordered to pay child support. I pay my child support faithfully. I have parenting time with my son once a month in Michigan that began at two 4 hour visits, then graduated to a 24 hour visit, to finally, a 48 hour visit. I have been doing this since my son was 6 months old. Every step of the way and at every juncture of my parenting time schedule, my son’s mother has made it difficult for me to visit and bond with my son. If my Skype sessions aren’t being cut short, she is either showing up late or arriving extremely early during my stays in Michigan to collect my son. She even decided to no longer allow me to borrow her car seat for our son. I now rent one every time I am in Michigan. And during the time I do have my son in my care, she is calling my cell phone or my hotel room to check on my whereabouts.
Along with the current 48 hours of parenting time, I was also awarded a 4 day Boston visit during this year’s Christmas holiday. She did not take that well.
The latest obstacle that my son’s mother has thrown at me was to sue me for child support and full custody in Michigan despite the fact that we have a pending trial in February and she has been awarded child support in Massachusetts, the state that currently holds jurisdiction over our case. She has also filed an emergency motion to restrict my parenting time coincidentally just before my son’s Christmas visit.
My son’s mother is trying to break me, spiritually and financially. I have borrowed from family, maxed out credit cards and over-extended myself with personal loans to keep up with my attorney fees and travel expenses. I am at my financial wits end.
A message needs to be sent that a father has rights. I cannot and will not give up this fight.
I am asking you to donate whatever you can. No gift is too small. All proceeds will go to my legal fees, personal loans and creditors.
No information is provided about where you can contribute. Try to Google his name to see which Crowdfunding site he may be registered with.
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