Sorry Ma’am, We’re Going to Have to Let You Go for Excessive Farting

Amy-Herbst-Singer-Farts-Job-300x164

*Hey, we’ve all lost a job at some point in our life, right?

Maybe our work was of poor quality. We were tardy one too many times. Or we were caught after making a bad judgement call.

Hey, there is a price to pay for this. Do better work! Come to work on time! Stop making bad choices!!!

But what if it’s something that wasn’t our fault? Something we had absolutely no control over and we got fired for it? And what if you were an opera singer?

Or the unfortunate member of her ensemble seated right behind her…

Where am I going with this? Keep reading.…it gets worse.

Amy Herbst, an opera singer, has found herself out of work after a routine surgery left her unable to sing without farting.

And Herbst, a professional who has performed at the Nashville Opera Company, is not going out like that!

Earlier this month the singer filed a lawsuit against Fort Campbell’s Blanchfield Army Community Hospital claiming that the episiotomy she received during child birth last February caused her to lose control of her flatulence and, on occasion, bowel movements.

Oh this is bad.

Women who have given childbirth (not including C-section) understand that the episiotomy is the cut that helps with the delivery of the baby. In the case of Herbst, the cut didn’t heal sufficiently, and now she can’t control her functions as she could before childbirth.

There was a “complete breakdown of the episiotomy and perineum.”

Herbst’ lawsuit reads: “As a result of her incontinence and excessive flatulence, Herbst has been unable to work as a professional opera singer.”

Further,

“She is suffering though a very embarrassing and very significant injury, and frankly, the prognosis of a fully successful repair is pretty low,” Herbst’s attorney, Charles Allen, told the Army Times.

Herbst and her husband are seeking $2.5 million in damages.

Sidebar: Sounds like a bargain to me. Jus’ sayin’.

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