*Kordale and Kaleb have gathered quite a following on social media over the past months. However, I (and probably many others) only recently became familiar with them – following their post of the above photo on Instagram. The photo of two gay men getting their girls ready for school probably depicts a typical day in this family’s household, but then it went viral and the brouhaha it caused was not for the reasons you might think. Add black to the mix and everything changes.
It seems any photo showing black men taking care of their children gets more attention than it should. I say this because though many African American men take care of their children, it seems that society is more comfortable focusing on those who don’t.
Many of the negative tweets from Kaleb & Kordale’s photo have since been deleted; but they didn’t seem to point so much to the fact that the men were gay, only to the fact that the gay men were black.
Moreover, many of the posts supposedly came from black people themselves.
This story does appear to raise larger cultural questions about expectations of masculinity and parenting in the black community. And I must admit that as a black woman seeing this photo my brow did raise. Not because I’m homophobic (I’m not in the least), but my “mother” instinct kicked in and knowing that even in heterosexual families, fathers are sometimes a bit uncomfortable with “all things girlie” and generally defer to moms when it comes to certain issues surrounding our daughters; so for two gay men to choose this challenge, raising young girls on their own, just struck me as unusual, not to mention brave.
Kaleb and Kordale’s photo caption read:
Being fathers is getting our daughters up at 5:30 am making breakfast getting them dressed for school and putting them on the bus by 6:30 .This is a typical day in our household . It’s not easy but we enjoy every moment and every minute of #fatherhood .#proudfathers #blackfathers #prouddads #gaydads
Upon further research, I did learn that the girls’ mother is in the picture (which brought its own set of questions) like: Are either of these men the biological father? If they are the “parents” what does that make her?
Upon contacting Kaleb and Kordale, the Huffington Post learned that they wanted opinions on the posted picture and they say they can’t be mad at people for giving them.
Read more of this story at Huffington Post.