*Just like when you go to your favorite porn site (don’t judge me), let’s clear the kids out of the room and cut right to the chase: there is NOTHING more uncomfortable for the bruthas than an itchy, sweaty sack.
So for our collective relief, I present to you: Nadkins, “male jewels refresher towelettes.”
According to the company’s website, “a lot of thought and care went into the creation of Nadkins.”
I would hope so.
“After all,” the site continues, “this isn’t designed for any old part of the body.”
No shit. Kunta Kinte even opted to have a foot cut off to save his balls. As much as I love my feet (I said don’t judge me!), I’d have been hobbled, too. Continue reading
*I just watched the film classic Jaws last week. It’s STILL the scariest film I’ve ever seen. I still remember seeing it for the first time as a kid. My love of the water is what made it so terrifying, even when I was old enough to realize how fictionalized the story was. I mean, really…a monstrous great white shark terrorizing a coastal resort town? Never.
How about “now!”
The locals on Stewart Island, New Zealand claim that a human feeding frenzy is inevitable. Ever since businesses there started offering shark cage-diving experiences almost ten years ago, they say the sharks that have always been close have gotten much more aggressive. Some have even begun attacking boats.
“We see them all the time and not just one,” says one 72-year-old lifelong resident, who rarely recalls seeing a shark up close while he was growing up. “Sometimes there are three or four surrounding our boats. We are being targeted, and it’s only a matter of time before they get someone.”
A group of islanders have petitioned the city to shut the shark cage-diving operations down. “It’s like Jaws anonymous out there,” says one local fisherman. Continue reading
*As I write this, its incomprehensible to me, the degree of hate that would have to consume a person who would do such a thing as murder their own child, along with her mother, because he was ordered to pay $600 in child support.
But it is exactly what Daron Maurice Boswell-Johnson of District Heights, Md. did. And on Wednesday, he was arrested.
NeShanté Davis and her 2-year-old little girl, Chloe, were found in the parking lot outside of their home.
Little Chloe was still in her car seat when the police arrived. Her mother, just outside of the car. Continue reading
*I’m not even gonna front. I complain about stuff. How I don’t look like I used to? And why is this so this and that so that.
You know how it is.
But so often we come up against something at makes us complainers want to slap ourselves. What on earth do we have to complain about?
Imagine if we had a REAL problem…like tree-trunk-looking warts growing all over our body?
Uh huh. That’s what I thought.
Follow me. Continue reading
*And to think this commercial ALMOST made it to TV.
Let’s just say somebody has no sense of humor.
In this commercial for Bud Light, when men learn they can get a beer if they donate an article of clothing, all bets are off!
Professionalism be damned! You have a man interviewing another and when he gets up to shake hands, the potential employee notices the interviewer has no pants on.
You have another man getting into an elevation with two women (one an elder) and he is …buck naked!
Must’ve been those darn board members who said, “Scratch it!” Continue reading
*Oh damn. I know every woman reading this, who has gone through labor, can feel this woman’s pain.
So here you are, cramping like its nobody’s business for hours on end. Finally, you can’t take it anymore, and you allow somebody to call 911 or take you to the emergency room themselves.
That’s what happened to this mother of four. Amber Hughes went into labor at 30 weeks (according to this site its usually 40 for full term). This wasn’t really a surprise to her because doctors had warned her that, since she lost her mucus plug at 24 weeks, early labor was more than possible.
But then Hughes learned that the baby had an infection after she had gone through 36 hours of hard labor (and here I was complaining at 17!!!) and she was rushed to emergency.
So why did she not actually hear the baby doing that whole birth-cry thing as the doctors were mulling around in her open stomach? Continue reading
*Domonique “Nikki” Smith was only 18 when she died unexpectedly in June 2015. And Tanisha Bahsam had been on a waiting list for a new heart, because she had congestive heart failure, for 18 months. So the only thing grieving mother, Vicki Olds, thought to do, was donate her daughter’s heart to Bahsam.
Smith says she actually had to convince her friend to take the gift.
“I was overwhelmed,” Basham, 41, said in a press release. And that is why she didn’t want to accept the generous donation at first.
But Olds insisted and said to her, ‘Tanisha, you’re like my sister. You’ll always have my baby with you.'”
I have a feeling it was that ‘last part’ that really did it.
Olds wanted to do something beautiful for Bahsam, and Bahsam wanted to ultimately do something beautiful for her. And what better way to accomplish this than accepting Nikki’s organ? Continue reading
*I swear, if it ain’t one thing its another. To be on the safe side, we might have to go ‘Chi-Raq’ and not have sex at all!
Not so much as a punishment, as the women in the Spike Lee flick by the same name did; but for our own protection as people, men and women alike.
Well, that might be a bit extreme. But it gives you damn good reason NOT to give in to the old “But I can’t feel anything” argument your partner may present about using protection. Because now, a recent virus called ‘Zika’ has been put in the mix. And the risk factor has just upgraded! Continue reading